See each other. Definitely. I say this both as a photographer and as a former bride. Commonly referred to as a “first look” or a “reveal,” this practice allows the couple to see each for the first time as bride and groom in a private moment before the ceremony.
When you see each other for the first time at the alter, you get to smile, hold hands and get on with it. With a first look, you can take time to really experience that moment. You can cry. You can hug. You can tell each other how smokin’ hot you look. You can even do all those things at once! What’s even better is that you get to have pictures of it all (pardon my bias, but I honestly can’t help myself).
A first look also allows you to complete all of your formal portraits before the ceremony, which in turn allows you to maintain the momentum and emotion of the ceremony straight through to the reception. You don’t have make a fake exit, circle back into the sanctuary, and wrangle up all your family and bridal party members. Instead, you’re free to jump in the limo, snuggle up to your honey and drive off into the sunset.
My strong preference for the first look approach isn’t just because it provides opportunities for beautifully emotional images or because it’s a more efficient use of precious wedding day time. I also prefer it because I know how stressful a wedding can be when you don’t have your best friend and partner by your side. My man and I didn’t see each other before the ceremony, and I was a giant bucket of stress. My one and only attendant was MIA, my grandmother-in-law-to-be was lost, and the clock was tick-tick-ticking. By the time I started my walk down the aisle (20 minutes late), I was such a mess that I burst into tears the moment I laid eyes on my man. And believe me when I say that my cry-face is not my most attractive look.
The one thing that would have put the kibosh on the pre-ceremony freak-out session would have been having my honey next to me, making me laugh, giving me smooches, and assuring me that no matter how many things went wrong, we’d still end up married and happy at the end of the day.
If there ever comes a day when I can talk my husband into marrying me again (I try it every year), believe me, we will see each other beforehand. We will cry. We will hug. We will tell each other how smokin’ hot we look. We may even do all those things at once, and there will be amazing photographs of it all.
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